The Trials of Unemployment

I'm still in the excited to be unemployed stage at the moment, perhaps the best place to be. There is still some money in the bank, I've still got a to-do-list of weird things, I'm yet to embark on any weird craft projects and I still regularly shower.

The slide into 'bum-ness' is creeping up on me though. I stay up later and sleep in later each day, my PJ's have turned into do anything clothes (I pity the poor neighbours) and showers are getting more and more sporadic. I even caught myself thinking about the whole self washing hair concept and if it would be worth a trial.

Job interview this morning though, so time to awaken, remember how to put on makeup, get my glad rags on and go sell myself. Fingers crossed this halts the bum slide a little!

Unemployment

After a crazy crazy 2010 year I have officially sent in my resignation letter and am now unemployed. Horribly relieved. Horribly terrified. Having a bit of a cry that its finally all over. Now the goodness that is 2011 can finally start.

Goodness

I did a bit of philosophy back in my uni days. Back when I was super young and naive and full of innocence. We talked a lot about the goodness of people and if we are born 'bad' or 'good'. There were no clear answers (as it always seems to be with philosophy). However, despite the 6 years of living that has happened between now and then, my views have not changed considerably.

I do think people are good. Yes we have a heck of a lot of falleness in us. I think we stuff up a lot. We lie. We cheat. We steal. We are selfish. We stuff up hugely. But I still think we are good. There is goodness in all of us. The hope of being a better person. The hope of live lived not just entirely for ourselves. The hope we can love. The hope we can fix our mistakes. The hope of mending brokenness. Redemptive hope.

There is capacity for evilness in us all. I think none of us are exempt. But I love that I feel we are given a choice. Evil is often the easy default, which saddens me a lot. We can explain away atrocious behaviour by claiming the 'default' of evil. Man up I say. Choose good. Work from a model of the goodness inside yourself. Believe it in others. Sure you do get a little cynical, but I like to think of it as wisdom unconventionally expressed. Perfection isn't currently humanely achievable, constantly striving for it wears you down something chronic. But goodness, I feel we can get there with. And perhaps in doing so, catch some glimpses of the goodness that is to come.

Concession Passes

Concession passes make me very happy. Why? Because they mean I've committed to going to something at least 10 times which is the perfect amount for really getting into a new activity. Concession passes also have the goodness of saving money, usually not much, but I love saving money/feeling like I got a bargain.

So highlights of my day? Drinking obscene amounts of juice (actually obscene, my juicer hates me as does the flat account on which I bought all the produce), getting a concession pass to the Parnell Pools and managing to swim 1440m. A serious achievement for someone who used to hate putting her head under water! With the 9 passes I have left I hope to do some good improvement on that length!

Beachin' it up

I'm one of these people who loves the idea of summer, but the reality doesn't always rock my world. I love the idea of swimming, chilling, tanning (safely with sunscreen on of course), eating chunks of watermelon, millions of BBQ's with friends, everyone laughing all the time.

In reality, this never happens. Summer is usually hot and sticky, most of my friends are away having their own exciting summers, watermelon remains at $7 per kg, the beach is a million miles away, I don't own a BBQ and I'm not a fan of lying in the sun until I'm crispy with a side of sweaty.

Does this happen to anyone else? Or is it just me usually counting down to the cool days of Autumn craving the regular routine of the year starting and everyone settling back to normal and being able to sleep properly at night?

Every year I vow it will be different and I'll love summer. This year I set my expectations lower (its my new aim in life, to consciously underestimate the enjoyment/happiness factor and then be pleasantly surprised when it is enjoyable - it may not be successful, but I'll let you know) and so far its been going ok. This week I've been swimming, not once but TWICE in the ocean and its been amazing. Great weather, great water temperature, great company and just enough waves to make it fun and not feel like I'm drowning. In the course of the same week I've also been road tripping, eaten food off a BBQ, tanned a little, taken crazy photos at the beach AND chilled out.

Summer, you may have redemptive qualities after all.

Preventative Wisdom

I'm learning that part of being an adult is learning about preventative wisdom. It's choosing to think more, consider your options and make informed and hopefully wise choices. Part of me hates preventative wisdom in the short term but acknowledges the long term benefits (aka less heartbreak) that will hopefully come as a result of it make it worth the short term pain.

When did we grow up all of a sudden?