Pity Party for 1

Training for an event is totally different than just exercising for fun.
I'm totally knackered tonight. Double training day of 45 minutes at the gym followed by a 30 minute run. My body is tired and telling me it bed and sleep time.
I've been feeling quite disheartened recently. I did a quarter marathon recently and it was hard work. And it was only 10km. And I got overtaken so so much in the race. And the girl I wanted to beat totally owned me. I guess when you are training away by yourself its easy to feel fast and superior? I don't have many people around me to compare myself with, I guess I've built up the view of myself higher than it should be. Last Sunday was a totally knocking me back into place thing. One of the worst bits was getting the e-mail with the race pictures. I had a vision of a sleek, strong racer girl. The pics look a little like the opposite.
Its hard to know how much self talk to give myself. I'm never going to be a very fast athlete. I'm never going to win. I'm going to have to push myself. I guess I just wish I was GOOD at something.

Time to restart reading positive literature again. "The Winner's Bible" currently holds a place on my bedside table. I should read it more. Tell myself encouraging little things. That this triathlon is for me. Not to prove myself to any one else. Just to prove to myself that I can do it and admire how far I've come. And I will do it. Even if I come last. And thats ok. I've come last before (on national tv no less) and it sucked a bit and then I mainly forgot.

Pity party over. Early night time.

Grapefruit

http://xkcd.com/388/

I love xkcd. its like they summed up life neatly.
apart from grapefruit. they are actually delicious.

Next time I'm going to choose a nicer goal

Why on earth did I have to choose a flippin triathalon to keep me busy?? Why didn't I choose something like "learn what to do with primer", "figure out how to change to oil in my car", "go speed dating". No, i chose NONE of those. And thought oh goody, a triathalon, I can barely swim 25m, don't own a bike, have been told not to run by the physio, but no wait, that sounds like an excellent challenge. What was I bloody thinking.

Started new training regime this week. Bit dead. Bit tired. Bit angry at the world. I need a holiday, but I just got back from one. Maybe I'll just hide in bed this weekend between my long run and recovery swim.

Starting the Savings Trend

I love spending money, so its almost a given that I suck at saving money. It's something that brings me grief almost every paycheck - the number of things I want to buy seems outnumbers my bank balance and its a horrible struggle between my self control and my lack of control. So I've decided to take some positive action. And start actual savings. It's quite a nice relief in all honesty to have a budget again and to have to stick to it. And thinking up plans for you savings is quite rewarding - almost as fun as spending it on stuff (well not quite, but none of the guilt of buying another black top).
Current favourite options: Trip to Peru. New sunglasses. Trip to Australia. New car.

Running in the rain

One of those weeks where I've put my heart out on the line and I've got the wait time in the middle. I think running in the rain with a great friend perhaps one of the best things ever to do in the meantime.

Running makes you feel alive like nothing else.

I hardly ever enjoy rain these days. As a kid rain dancing and playing in the rain was a treat. Nowadays its the end of straight fringes, smudges of mascara and wet and soggy socks.

Purposefully going out the in the rain though, it gets out the cobwebs. Makes childhood come back alive. Clears out your brain. Makes the bath and book at the end so much more worth it!

I'd like to be superman person thanks.

How come some people are Superman while I'm definately not? Superman people are those ones who are up at 4:50am for their spin class, cook wholesome breakfasts, the ones who always have curled hair, who actually IRON their work clothes, who seem to be super cooks, super entertainers, super bloggers. Thinking about them exhuasts me quite a bit.

I meanwhile seem to have perfected the art of non super human. I found myself tumble drying my work shirts on Sunday night, giving them a good shake and hanging them up in my closet. The dryer IS my iron, if it can't be tumble dried, I don't buy it (or I do and just ignore the warnings and yes I do own some excruciatingly tight items of woollen clothing thanks to this mentality). I have often counted a coffee and brichoe eaten en route to work a decent breakfast and consider the milk 'almost like a whole food if you think about it right'. I go through a bottle of dry shampoo on a regular basis to save on hair washing (that stuff is GOLD I tell you).

I often like to think that I could be a superman person. Last week on Sunday I got my superside all organised, foods into small containers, may have ironed a few shirt collars, plotted nutritious breakfasts, vowed to only drink green tea, planned my gym plan of attack. It last until about Tuesday on which I felt great. Wednesday I did not, Thursday I was hoping it would pass. Friday I had home sick.

I have come to the conclusion that superman people are on drugs. Ones a heck of a lot stronger than my spirulina/B vitamin combo and frankly, I cannot be stuffed trying to take ANY more tablets.

New style Larabars! Yipee!

So I've upped the exercise and eating tenfold over the past week (and promptly gotten sick, that serves me right for trying to do too much, too soon!) and have been attempting to find something that is quick and easy to grab pre workout. I love smoothies, but first thing in the morning I find them a bit cold and intense and I'm no ones favourite flatmate if I get the whizz stick or juicer going "What ARE you juicing?? TREES??" has been a previous comment while shoving hunks of unpeeled ginger through the juicer very early! I;m also not much of a breakfast girl so small and quick is the best.

I've attempted making my own lara bars with mixed results previously... they just weren't quite right... (old nuts anyone?) So I was delighted to find new RAW bars at the special needs store when I went!

They are made mainly with dates and chopped up nuts and are super delicious! I gobbled the ginger one in the car on the way home. At $2.80 each they are more expensive than all my treat foods [insert very sad face] and are not very viable for an everyday option. But they have inspired me to give homemade ones another go! And a nice alternative to chocolate bars when needed.

Alas the hunt for pre workout food continues.

Get the whole run down on the RAW bars at: http://tiny.cc/d245h