I'm back.

Well 7 months later... I'm back. Triathlon done. Goal achieved. Non existent summer over. Another birthday. Quarter of a century of life achieved. Boy meet. Oceans traveled. Skype utilized. Ring on finger. Bags packed. Tickets booked. Lawyer consulted. Forms filled out. Forms re filled out. Forms sent. Love letters copied. See you laters said. Layovers owned. Hours of movies watched. Plane sleep non existent. Nervous wait. Immigration cleared. 90 days stamped. Bag collected. Micah hugged. And hugged. And hugged. Hello.

Hello America

There is something compelling about that blue screen on planes that show you where you are in your trip. It starts of hovering over the airport and then the plane rights itself and flies the direction you are heading. I love watching the distance creep past, the trip to Australia seem to speed by, land always in sight, Sydney welcoming. That daunting part hits though when you are suspended in the middle of the ocean. No land in sight either way. New Zealand seems a world away. No proportion or scale to let you know where you are. And you realize you are truly in the middle of nowhere.

Then hours later, America appears. That solid west coast, LA a tempting dot. Nevada perched up higher. Hello future home.

Pity Party for 1

Training for an event is totally different than just exercising for fun.
I'm totally knackered tonight. Double training day of 45 minutes at the gym followed by a 30 minute run. My body is tired and telling me it bed and sleep time.
I've been feeling quite disheartened recently. I did a quarter marathon recently and it was hard work. And it was only 10km. And I got overtaken so so much in the race. And the girl I wanted to beat totally owned me. I guess when you are training away by yourself its easy to feel fast and superior? I don't have many people around me to compare myself with, I guess I've built up the view of myself higher than it should be. Last Sunday was a totally knocking me back into place thing. One of the worst bits was getting the e-mail with the race pictures. I had a vision of a sleek, strong racer girl. The pics look a little like the opposite.
Its hard to know how much self talk to give myself. I'm never going to be a very fast athlete. I'm never going to win. I'm going to have to push myself. I guess I just wish I was GOOD at something.

Time to restart reading positive literature again. "The Winner's Bible" currently holds a place on my bedside table. I should read it more. Tell myself encouraging little things. That this triathlon is for me. Not to prove myself to any one else. Just to prove to myself that I can do it and admire how far I've come. And I will do it. Even if I come last. And thats ok. I've come last before (on national tv no less) and it sucked a bit and then I mainly forgot.

Pity party over. Early night time.

Grapefruit

http://xkcd.com/388/

I love xkcd. its like they summed up life neatly.
apart from grapefruit. they are actually delicious.

Next time I'm going to choose a nicer goal

Why on earth did I have to choose a flippin triathalon to keep me busy?? Why didn't I choose something like "learn what to do with primer", "figure out how to change to oil in my car", "go speed dating". No, i chose NONE of those. And thought oh goody, a triathalon, I can barely swim 25m, don't own a bike, have been told not to run by the physio, but no wait, that sounds like an excellent challenge. What was I bloody thinking.

Started new training regime this week. Bit dead. Bit tired. Bit angry at the world. I need a holiday, but I just got back from one. Maybe I'll just hide in bed this weekend between my long run and recovery swim.

Starting the Savings Trend

I love spending money, so its almost a given that I suck at saving money. It's something that brings me grief almost every paycheck - the number of things I want to buy seems outnumbers my bank balance and its a horrible struggle between my self control and my lack of control. So I've decided to take some positive action. And start actual savings. It's quite a nice relief in all honesty to have a budget again and to have to stick to it. And thinking up plans for you savings is quite rewarding - almost as fun as spending it on stuff (well not quite, but none of the guilt of buying another black top).
Current favourite options: Trip to Peru. New sunglasses. Trip to Australia. New car.

Running in the rain

One of those weeks where I've put my heart out on the line and I've got the wait time in the middle. I think running in the rain with a great friend perhaps one of the best things ever to do in the meantime.

Running makes you feel alive like nothing else.

I hardly ever enjoy rain these days. As a kid rain dancing and playing in the rain was a treat. Nowadays its the end of straight fringes, smudges of mascara and wet and soggy socks.

Purposefully going out the in the rain though, it gets out the cobwebs. Makes childhood come back alive. Clears out your brain. Makes the bath and book at the end so much more worth it!